It started raining last night. It rained much of the night. It's raining off and on this morning. And I love it. It brings calm to my heart. It reminds me to stop whatever it is I'm rushing to do and take some deep breaths.
Today I will do my best to remain calm and peaceful. I will strive to gently guide my child through his day, reaching always toward positives and success for him. I will wrap myself around his small body and lead him toward the quiet places I know he must have within him. It's hard to remember that sometimes.
Right now, at this moment, I'm sitting on my bed writing this and Luken is in the bathtub. I hear a constant stream of his verbal froth in the high squeaky voice he uses when he's stimming. He's playing with monster trucks in the bath. "Ac-tek, ac-tek, ac-tek, wooo, woo, wooo, wooo." Over and over again. He's found a groove that works for him.
I am coming to learn that grooves that work for Luken look strange to many folks. I used to be more concerned about it than I am now. When he finds a comfortable space for his body and brain, I try to be grateful for it, not to change it into something that might seem more socially acceptable. It's a learning process.
I love my son. We're going to have a great day together. I just know we are.
August 21 - December 7
3 days ago