Kiss The Fiddler

Ramblings, moments of humor, random thoughts, experiences, insights, simple wisdom, and whatever else I feel like sharing.

Thursday, December 31, 2009


I don't like New Year's resolutions. I think they're made to be broken.

So I'm going to think about some goals instead. Goals are meant to be worked toward.

I want to have more sex in my marriage.
I want to continue to work toward better health.
I want to live in a cleaner house.
I want to grow my business.
I want to grow in my marriage.
I want to nurture my child so that he may grow into the beautiful person he is.
I want to take time for me every now and then.

I know that these are not easy goals. They will take work. They aren't right now sorts of things. I won't meet these goals in a day, a week, or even in a month. They will require ongoing thought and effort.

I am happy that I contain what it takes to meet these goals. I am strong and creative and persistent. I am poised for success.

Happy New Year!


Gratitude December 31, 2009

1. That the new year brings a whole year's worth of new opportunities
2. That I am capable of learning
3. That my wife loves me without expecting me to be perfect.


Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Gratitude Dec. 30, 2009

Today I am thankful for

1. Larkin
2. the beautiful spot I live in
3. that Kara comes home every night.


Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Gratitude Dec. 29, 2009

Today I am thankful for

1. Eagles
2. Being home
3. Bushmill's


Such a Charming Child

Well, I have learned that Luken does NOT like sleeping at G'ma's house.

An old friend of mine passed last week and so I drove four hours across the mountains with Luken in order to attend the funeral. I stayed at my mom's house. I put Luken to bed in his pack and play in the guest room. After a few minutes of crying, I noticed that the origin of the noise had changed. I went to the top of the stairs to see him doing the zombie walk toward me. He'd managed to climb out of his bed and was on his way to find me. Poor baby was so scared. He was shaking so hard. I felt so bad for him. He wasn't hurt, just scared.

After I calmed him down, I tried to put him back to bed. Ha ha ha! He spent the next FOUR hours crying and screaming and carrying on. OMG! After he FINALLY wore himself out and fell asleep, he woke about every 40 minutes ALL night for another go-round with the crying. OMG!

At the funeral, he spent most of his time screeching or throwing tantrums. Awesome!

He slept the ENTIRE 4 hour drive home. I sure hope he sleeps tonight.


Monday, December 28, 2009

Gratitude Dec. 28, 2009

Today I am thankful for

1. My sweet's kisses
2. baby kisses
3. kitty kisses


Sunday, December 27, 2009

My goals for the week of December 27th

As always, it's my goal to take my meds daily. However, I no longer feel the need to write this goal down.

1. Take supplements daily.
2. Do 40 crunches daily
3. Do 40 scissor leg thingies daily.
4. Do 40 pelvic lifts daily.
5. Take blood pressure daily.
6. Exercise daily.
7. Think about what I'm eating and why I'm eating it before I eat it.
8. Clean one area daily.
9. Weigh only once.

Gratitude December 27, 2009

Today I am thankful for

1. My own potential for growth and positive change
2. That each snowflake (and person) is different
3. My cats' purrrrrrr


Our House

Our house on Christmas Day


Saturday, December 26, 2009


Luken has been saying "uh-oh" for quite awhile now. Well, today he's added to that. Now he says "uh-oh, ba-jI-a-jo". Uh-oh, spaghetti-o. So cute!




Today I am thankful for

1. a peaceful day with no schedule or expectations
2. dark chocolate dipped candied oranges
3. baby motrin


Friday, December 25, 2009

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Currents Fun

Today we met Kara's brother and his family at Currents waterpark for some splashing fun. Luken LOVES that place! When he realizes where we are, he starts hooting. It's so cute!

I didn't get any pictures of him in the big pools because I was either swimming laps or in there with him. Here he is in the warm pool though. He had lots of fun playing catch with Joel.


Christmas Eve Puppy

My dear sweet wife got me a flip mino for Christmas! We each opened one gift tonight and I opened that. I LOVE it! I look forward to sharing lots of videos here.

I'm trying to upload one now but it's taken over an hour. Not sure It's going to make it.

Merry Christmas, everybody. I hope you are safe and warm and happy. I hope you know that you are loved.


Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Monday, December 21, 2009


Today is the shortest day of the year. Starting tomorrow, the light will begin trickling back into our lives. Today, as I was walking, I looked at the sky. The sun was poking face through fog and gray, gradually melting the clouds. It was warm, near 60 degrees. It felt good to walk. The mountains are still snow covered, as they should be this time of year. The valley floor though, is mostly slush covered. A bit tenuous for walking with a stroller. We are getting weather. All day clouds pushed against the mountains to the west of here. Toward evening, they started spilling over the mountains down toward the valley. Now, there is rain. Rain and peace.

Be well.


Sunday, December 20, 2009

Goals for the Week

Goals for week of Dec 21.

1. Take meds daily.
2. Take supplements daily.
3. Write down eats/feelings.
4. Do 40 modified crunches daily
5. Do 40 scissor leg thingies daily
6. Take blood pressure daily
7. Exercise on Monday
8. exercise on Tuesday
9. exercise on Wednesday
10. exercise on Thursday
11. Hike on Saturday
12. Exercise on Sunday
13. Weigh once, on Monday and not again until next week.


Sunday, December 13, 2009

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Open House - My Story

Ok, not so much a story but a re-cap.

I held a car seat safety clinic today. I sold two brand new seats. I took a seat out of use that was manufactured in 1987. Seats expire 5 years after date of manufacture. I was happy to be able to provide seats today. I also answered tons of questions.

After the open house, our families came for dinner and we had our holiday party. I was so proud to have Kara and Luken there.

Luken tips his hat.

My family.

Herb giving tours.

Luken and his buddy, Tommy.

I had a great day and now I'm tired.


Open House

Florence Fire Station celebrates grand opening
by PERRY BACKUS - Ravalli Republic

FLORENCE - On Saturday, Florence volunteer firefighters are going to open the doors to their new fire station to the public to celebrate their grand opening.

And then they’re going to hope the fire bell doesn’t ring.

The fire department tried this once before in September. Everything was just about set when the Kootenai Creek Fire blew up and the crews scrambled to go help their brethren in Stevensville.

Since that day, the folks who call Florence home have already been enjoying the new 15,000 square foot building set on the same site as the former station.

“People in this community are really, really proud of the new facility,” said Hugh Warford, the Florence Fire Department’s assistant chief. “So are we … we’re all very proud that we didn’t have to raise taxes to do it.”

The new building - with its large meeting room, expanded bays, deluxe kitchen and new offices - cost somewhere close to $800,000.

The down payment on the building was squirreled away over the years through a variety of means, including some long hours spent by volunteers fighting wildfires all across the countryside. Some of the money was raised through fees paid by developers of new subdivisions.

The district financed about $500,000 of the cost of construction, while managing to keep about $300,000 stashed away in an emergency fund.

“Just about everything this fire district buys has been paid off early,” Warford said. “I wouldn’t be surprised to see this loan be paid off early as well.”

Fire District Trustee Jim Shreve said planning for the new building started about 5ƒ years ago.

At that time, there was talk about building a second smaller station in the Hidden Valley area, but then folks took a good hard look at the old fire station, which was lacking in so many ways.

“We took a vote and decided to do a significant update to this building first,” Shreve said.

The district hired Lee Kerig as architect and the building was built less than a year later.

Since then the building has become a beehive of activity with firefighters training and the community taking advantage of the new digs to host all sorts of meetings and affairs.

An example: Next Tuesday at 7 p.m., the Sisters in the Raw will be sharing their secrets of preserving raw meats and vegetables for a healthier cuisine.

“The building is booked four nights a week, sometimes even five,” said Florence Fire Chief Charlie Lambson. “The public seems to be pretty happy that this is here for them to use.”

All they have to do is call Lambson and reserve a spot. The use of the building for any non-profits is free.

“We do accept donations though,” Warford said.

Having a modern facility also helps in recruiting volunteers for the department. Right now, the department has 41 volunteers who are called on to respond to an average of 300 calls a year.

“We’ve lost about a half dozen over the last year because of the economy,” Lambson said. “We always have room for new super eager volunteers.”

One of those new volunteers is Nick Monaco who is quite impressed with the new station.

“I’m just excited about just how warm and inviting this building is,” Monaco said.

“The old one was like a garage.”

Community members can come and see for themselves on Saturday, Dec. 12 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. The station is located on Holloway Lane just west of the traffic light.

The open house will feature a quilt raffle, blood pressure checks, door prizes, emergency medical information, CPR information, tours, child seat safety instruction, and, of course, treats.

“We’ll also have the big screen TV tuned into the Griz game,” Lambson said. “I know I’m going to be spending some time around that.”

Log on to to comment on this and other stories.

Editor Perry Backus can be reached at 363-3300 or



Posted using ShareThis

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

What Fun!

Today I took Luken to a baby gym. When we walked in the door, he got so excited! He started hooting. It was so cute!

He had such a great time! It was so much fun to play with him and watch him exploring. Days like today are right there near the top of things I love about being a mom.


Tuesday, December 8, 2009


Pager: blah blah blah. Medical stage. blah blah blah. Shots fired.

It's midnight and well below zero.

From our homes scattered over the district, we drag ourselves from our warm beds and pull on jeans over long johns and shove stockinged feet into cold boots. We coax frozen cars to life.

And we gather.

We gather in the darkness, ready for whatever we will find. We gather and we wait.

Sirens of Law Enforcement Officer's cars go blaring past. We gather and wait.

You are over there. I am over here. In the dark, we do not see each other. We have gathered.

Radio: Per Law Enforcement on scene, you may cancel.

We come into the light and then we go, each to our own home. We gaze upon our sleeping children and we crawl into bed next to our warm and sleeping husbands, wives and sweethearts.



Food Log for Tuesday

Food diary for Tuesday, Dec. 8

Blood Pressure, 127/82

Meds: 400 – phenergan
1000 – cymbalta
1930 - cymbalta

1000 multivite
Blood pressure health
Brain health
Fruits and veggies

0030 - 2 pc bread torn up with peanut butter and honey in a bowl with milk. Feelings: hungry, bored, hyper.
600 – coffee with cream. Feelings – pissed at kara. Hungry.
1000 – oatmeal with protein powder and honey. More coffee. Feeling: cold, hungry, irritated with kara
1240 – xs and turkey jerky. Feelings: tired, headache, irritated with kara. Happy that the sun is shining. Not really hungry.
1400 – 2 c whole milk hot cocoa. Feelings: cold. Headache. Nauseated. Frustrated. Tired.
1900 – garden burgers in piecrust. Feelings: headache. Cold. Irritated with kara.

Positives - I was active for an hour or so on a fire tonight. Yay for activity!



All our degrees are gone. No degrees left. Nada. Zip. Zero. None. Zero degrees.


Monday, December 7, 2009

Going Places!

This evening Luken started walking to get from here to there. He walked all over the house with a giant grin on his face, his little arms waving about at his side. I wanted to take video of it but when I tried, he crawled. He's such a joker. I love him so much and I'm so proud of him!


Food Log for Monday

Food diary for Monday, Dec. 7

Weight: 220
Blood Pressure: 152/87

Meds: 10 am cymbalta
10 am Nexium
12 pm phenergan
12 pm lortab
4 pm lortab
5:30 pm lortab

Supplements: multi vitamin
3000 iu D3
2 CoQ10
1 Mag
2 Blood pressure health
2 Brain health


1 AM – ½ meal shake. Feeling: tired
3 AM – large bowl of cheerios with huge glop of peanut butter and 3 tablespoons sugar and milk. Feeling: sick.
10 AM – sweet coffee. Feeling: headache and upset stomach
1230 PM – ½ meal shake. Feeling: hopeless and afraid.
1400 nutri noodles with butter and curry seasoning. Feelings: a little more hopeful. Hungry. Sad.
1600 – blueberries. Feeling: Happy because I was sharing them with luken.
1640 - 2 squares of dark chocolate. Feeling: in pain and useless and frustrated.
1730 – bowl of home made chili and cheese. Feelings. Proud of the chili. Frustrated.
1750 – 2 cups hot chocolate. Feelings: pissed at kara. What a bitch she is to me.

Positives - I worked hard not to be judgmental of what I did or did not eat.


Health and Fitness Goals for this week

1. Weigh myself on Monday morning before breakfast of coffee. Do not weigh myself again until next Monday.

2. Take a multi vitamin every day.

3. Take other supplements daily.

4. Write down what I'm eating and when. Note my feelings at the time.

5. Have at least 3 periods of activity. This can be in the form of working out, walking, yoga, dancing, working on the fire dept. Don't care what it is, just has to be active.

So, there are my health and fitness goals for the week. Go me!


Bitch and Moan

I have had a headache now for a fucking week and a half, maybe more. What's up with that? The month before that was so good. And now I'm back to the fucking daily headacne and 5x weekly migraines. This fucking sucks! What am I doing differently?

I wonder if it's weight related. I wonder if my weight during that good month was low enough that my body wasn't over loaded with estrogen and now that I'm a pound or two up, there is too much estrogen. I know that estrogen is stored in fat cells. I know that I need to lose weight. It is so fucking hard. I know that I eat like crap. I need to change. I need help changing. I've tried and tried and tried different diets and exercise programs. I do well at the start and then I poop out. Something or another comes up and I gradually quit.

The headaches though are killing my energy and my happiness. I can't do this. I hear my baby babbling away happily in his crib because I put him there because my head hurt so bad I can't think. Yes, it's nap time for him but I feel like a terrible mother putting him in his crib when he's not tired because I can't deal with him due to the fucking headache. What a shit.

I am worried about my health. I just took my blood pressure and it was 152/87. I am not even 40 yet. I am too young for this bullshit. I MUST get healthy in order to be a good mother to my child. He deserves that. I deserve that.


Sunday, December 6, 2009

Busy River

The river is busy tonight. The river is freezing tonight. By morning, it will be frozen over.


Big Tires

Last night at the fire hall, I used tools like these

To work on tires like these

I checked the air pressure in these.

I helped put brand new steering tires on one of our type 3 engines. First, we removed the tires from the truck. We pulled the cores out of the valve stems so the tires would go flat. Then we removed the old tires from the wheels. I prepared the new tires by putting thick soap around the bead of each tire on both sides. Then the naked wheels got the new tires. I just watched this part. After the new tires were on the wheels, they got a dose of Tire Life each and I learned how to seat the tires. Then the core went into the valve stems and I aired the tires up to 100 pounds.

Then the tires were ready to go on to the truck.

No, I did'nt do all that myself. In fact, mostly I watched. But I did air the tires and check the air pressure. And I ran and got stuff. I learned a lot. It was fun.


Saturday, December 5, 2009

Parade of Lights

Last night, Kara, Luken and I went to Stevensville for their annual Parade of Lights. It was very cold and we were all bundled. We went into all the shops and looked at the art and ate the yummy snacks. We walked down Main Street with everybody else, singing Christmas carols in the cold night. Then the lights came on and everybody cheered. Luken was excited about the whole thing. He thought that the donkeys from the live cheche'.

The high point of the night, for me and for Luken, was the wagon ride. We waited next to a bonfire. The closer the wagons got to where we were, the more excited Luken became. Once we were on the wagon, sitting on out blanketed bale of straw, Luken was squealing and squawking. He was kicking his legs with glee. He kept this up for the entire ride, the whole time, with a gigantic grin on his face. It was so much fun!

After the wagon ride, we were all cold and so we headed home.

I had a great time out with my family.



Luken has his own drawer in the kitchen. It's the lowest in a stack of drawers and it has things in it that he can play with.

Today, he explored his drawer with his entire body

100_1382 by you.

100_1383 by you.
100_1339 by you.
100_1344 by you.
100_1349 by you.
100_1372 by you.

And, do wrap it up, a short video.